So I had to figure out what needed binding.
My post-twins girth: yes
Babies: yes, (with swaddling blankets, of course)
Playmat. I used that sweet-ass wood drawing fabric I had from the cushion-gone-goblin and made a quilted playmat where in, LISTEN TO THIS: quilted along the drawn lines of the fabric print. MacArthur Genius Grant, I'm coming for you.
And, though it's a shame to put chambray onto the back of anything because it is so purdy, it is also makes for an awesome secret surprise to put chambray onto the back of something.
HA, binding! I win. I WIN I WIN I WIN I WIN.